अज्ञश्चाश्रद्दधानश्च संशयात्मा विनश्यति | नायं लोकोऽस्ति न परो न सुखं संशयात्मन: || 40||

ajñaśh chāśhraddadhānaśh cha sanśhayātmā vinaśhyati nāyaṁ loko ’sti na paro na sukhaṁ sanśhayātmanaḥ

[Translated Meaning: The ignorant, the faithless, the doubting-self goes to destruction; there is neither this world, nor the other, nor happiness for the doubter—Gita Chap:4, SL:40]

 

Doubt about one’s abilities is something that everyone experiences at some point. Everything starts to seem questionable to you. In normal times, you’ll begin by asking, “Am I successful?” And in a gradual manner, it spreads to the next question. Whether or not the available funds are enough for my future. The question “Do I need to learn new skills?” follows as the virus spreads to your abilities. Am I in a better position than the other members of my team?

 

My Background

My personal experiences back up my claims. I’ve devoted almost 40% of my adult life to contemplating these issues alone. It wasn’t what I desired in the first place, but I joined a business firm immediately after graduation. Soon I jumped to the conclusion that success meant something else.

 

I clung to meaningless jobs, destructive relationships, and exhausting friendships, fearing the term quitter.

 

My self-doubt was too high, such that I started putting other people’s expectations ahead of my own. I used the same logic while making decisions. I was always having second thoughts. It was due to dealing with confidence and questioning my own judgement. Who am I competing for and why am I even doing this? I’ve never had a clear goal in mind.

 

My takeaway from this is that self-doubt is a vicious cycle that will lead to nothing but sorrow if I let it fester. The process of breaking free of this frame of mind also becomes quite challenging. As I worked my way out of this rut, I stumbled upon (or confirmed) a handful of simple strategies. Strategies for overcoming uncertainty and boosting self-assurance.

 

I hope these are useful, and I’ll share them with you:

 

1. Quit judging yourself with other people.

Put an end to comparing yourself to other people and what you’ve accomplished. Looking at how I’m performing in comparison to others brought out my worst self-doubts. When thinking about how I stack up to other people, completely inadequacy steps in. What’s worse is that it is easier for me to let envy get the best of me and develop an intense dislike for them.

 

The accomplishments of others should not be a measure of your own success, I discovered. No matter how little it may seem to other people, I discovered this. That when I do what works for me and makes me happy, I am filled with confidence.

 

2. Lack of concern

Inhibition sets in only when you begin to consider and assess the opinions of others. In this case, I like to paraphrase Mark Twain: “It’s better to keep quiet than open your mouth and remove all doubt.” In a similar vein, we always feel like this. It’s preferable to remain silent and uncriticized than to speak up and face criticism. Unfortunately, this is not good for you.

 

Staying paralysed by self-doubt will prevent you from achieving your full potential. The paralysis about your social status in specific. Your situation will likely improve if you do your best to cling to your dreams. As a result, moving forward requires letting go of what other people think of you.

 

3. Make a decision and adjust as needed.

One of the easiest ways to fall into self-doubt is to become stuck attempting to make a decision. The constant hemming and hawing about which option does nothing. It only increases feelings of inadequacy. It’s easy to become mired in that cycle of split-second decisions without any progress.

 

Then, what’s the remedy? In most cases, when faced with a dilemma, the best course of action is to trust your gut or intuition. Go with your natural instincts. This alternative is always prioritised over the alternatives that originate from outside.

 

4. Never forget to pamper yourself

A simple remark or encouraging phrase can lift anyone’s spirits. I have no doubt that you have all been through something similar at some point. Yet, what if you find yourself in a lonely place and lack self-assurance?

 

Whenever I needed to talk to someone, I would always turn to myself first. After watching 3 Idiots, I got this fantastic exercise. Recite this beautiful mantra to yourself: “ALL IS WELL” whenever you feel down. It has an immediate calming effect. If you begin to compliment yourself, you’ll be right back where you were.

 

Whenever I’m feeling overwhelmed by negative feelings or poor self-esteem, I remind myself. Remind yourself to repeat “THIS TOO SHALL PASS” and push through.

 

5. Cultivate a bond with your most ardent supporter.

No (wo)man is an island—meaning you can’t do it all on your own. You need other people; no one can do everything by themselves. The folks that are always there to reassure you are your biggest supporters. Since sometimes that’s all you need.

 

To begin, think about who is rooting for you the most. A friend, a family member, a colleague, or your spouse—and who thinks you’re superhero right now. Then, focus on developing meaningful connections. Relationship with these individuals by telling you how great you are. Let it be for no clear reason at all. They are something that we all have. Thus, it is important to cultivate them and gain power and confidence from them.

 

A more profound sensation of love and less feelings of self-doubt are possible, I’ve found. Found when I surround myself with my largest supporters. They help in keeping my eye on my own objectives, and practice (self) thankfulness.

 

Feel free to share any other tools that you find useful in the comments.